i hate that ineluctable feeling when you’re about to see someone who you know you won’t see again for a very, very long time. it’s so depressing. it makes me not even want to see that person. before i can even enjoy the company im already thinking about how hard it will be when i have to leave, how much i will dread saying good-bye, and how often i will occupy my mind with schemes to see that person again.

:( it sucks more when you know it’s something he/she wants to do, when it’s their passion, that is creating the distance. it’s unrealistic for me to assume i would only feel excitement and happiness that their dreams are coming to fruition. too bittersweet.