Janelle Ortiz

the facade.

i am starting to become ever more aware of the hypocrisy that is humanity. How can someone “love” you so much one day and ex-communicate you the next? People can be so phony. How are you able to cross someone out of your life so readily?

Everything happens for a reason. If it takes this to weed them out, then I am better off with out them.

gimme dat becky.

katiepalmer:

i am really amazing at putting myself into super awkward//weird situations- that have no resolution. sucks

my life story.

why?

does my roommate ALWAYS use the bathroom with the door open? is that totally necessary? i do not want to hear your turdlets plopping into the toilet water after you just peed and i know its splashing back up on you! c’mon man. if you know you’re going to poop close the daggon door.

esqueleto:

i just stepped on a snake

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

30 plays • download

katiepalmer:

it don’t make sense goin to heaven with the goodie-goodies
dressed in white, i like black timbs and black hoodies

when i die fuck it i wanna go to hell cuz im a piece of shit it aint hard to fuckin tell. it dont make sense going to heaven wit the goody goodies dressed in white i like black timbs and black hoodies. god’ll prolly have me on some real strict shit, no sleepin all day no gettin my dick licked! rollin with the goody goodies loungin in paradise, fuck that shit. i wanna tote guns and shoot dice.

love that song, what you know about biggie?

I will give you an example of how race affects my life. I live in a place called Alpine, New Jersey. Live in Alpine, New Jersey, right? My house costs millions of dollars. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. In my neighborhood, there are four black people. Hundreds of houses, four black people. Who are these black people? Well, there’s me, Mary J. Blige, Jay-Z and Eddie Murphy. Only black people in the whole neighborhood. So let’s break it down, let’s break it down: me, I’m a decent comedian. I’m a’ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the white man who lives next door to me does for a living? He’s a fucking dentist! He ain’t the best dentist in the world…he ain’t going to the dental Hall of Fame…He don’t get plaques for getting rid of plaque. He’s just a yank-your-tooth-out dentist. See, the black man gotta fly to get to something’ the white man can walk to.

“

—	Chris Rock (via spokenbeats) and there are probably no latinos either. tisk tisk, we needa change that.

defeatinglinkingverbs:

ortizjn:

defeatinglinkingverbs:

Performance- Wet Tee Tea Party (Like a Virgin)

lmao i am SO upset i missed this.

I am redoing it within the month, would you like to be invited?

oui!

esqueleto:

i’ll never understand why people will interact with me in the context of class or the internet but pretend i dont exist in public

exactly. that is why i got rid of facebook b.c its so superficial. DONT BE FAKE BITCH lol jk

defeatinglinkingverbs:

Performance- Wet Tee Tea Party (Like a Virgin)

lmao i am SO upset i missed this.